We take an inside look at good friendship and most importantly, how to look after yourself when faced with troubled friendship.
Our pals, Elisabeth and Bethany (who are besties IRL) talk about their own social circle, what those friends mean to them, and what to do when a relationship turns sour.
Whether you are a friend, have a friend or need a friend — this is compulsory viewing.
To watch a HD version of this video, please click here.
E: Hi, I’m Elisabeth
B: and I’m Bethany
E: Today we’re going to be talking about friendships. Good friends, bad friends, and toxic friendships, and what you can do to avoid them
B: So, what does friendship mean to you?
E: Well, friendship is a really important part of my life. I think I’m lucky because I have a few really close friends and to me that means we share similar values, like, my friends are always really open minded with really good morals which is important to me and I guess those people are people that really know me well and accept me for who I am with all my flaws and I know they’ll always be there, doesn’t matter what happens. So yeah, what about you?
B: Well, each of my friendships represent something different. I have one friend who I can call up any time of day to catch up for a coffee. We joke and tease each other and make silly videos on Vine. He’s a guy and it’s a very casual kind of friendship. I have another friend who I like to do creative stuff with, do things like teach sign language, we teach a class together, productive things. I have another friend who is a really good influence on me, she’s really healthy and fit, does yoga regularly and eats well and I think she’s a good role model for me. We like to go for long walks and talk about our relationships… and I have a best friend.. you
E: So what do you think makes a bad friend?
B: Someone who puts you down and makes you feel bad about yourself
E: I think someone who’s always criticising you and judging you and making you feel small
B: I think someone who gossips about you behind your back
E: I think someone who feels threatened by your achievements and tries to hold you back
B: I think someone who you feel.. you feel like they’re always talking but they don’t listen or value what you have to say
E: And I think someone who takes, takes, takes a lot and doesn’t give a lot back in the friendship
LOOK AFTER YOURSELF
E: If you have someone in your friendship circle that’s making you feel bad about yourself or putting you down, that’s a pretty big deal
B: It can be really stressful dealing with someone like that
E: It can make you feel less confident and feel bad about yourself
B: Yeah, and it can be really emotionally exhausting
E: If you have someone who is affecting your mental health in a big way, it might be time to do something about it
HOW TO DEAL WITH THE SITUATION
B: Realising someone isn’t good for you can be really hard, but there’s a few ways you can deal with it and start looking after yourself
E: One thing you can do is avoid hanging out with that person one on one, it could be hard at first but the less you hang out with that person by themselves, the better you’re going to feel
B: If that person contacts you and wants to see you, maybe you can bring another friend so you’re in a group and it’s less full on, and you don’t feel so much pressure
E: Another thing you can do is just talk with that person about how you’re feeling
B: It can be really hard or awkward but you will feel a lot better getting it off your chest
E: Yeah, and you might get a better idea about why they’re acting that way towards you, too
B: Yeah, maybe that person is going through something really difficult and you’re not aware of it, maybe they’re having a hard time at home
E: Yeah, and if you’re both open about your feelings, there’s a chance you could fix the situation and maybe your friendship will become stronger
B: But if that person is really making you miserable and it looks like it can’t be fixed, it might be time to let the friendship go
GET HELP & ADVICE
B: If you’re in a toxic friendship you don’t need to deal with it alone
E: No, you can talk about it with someone that you trust, maybe a parent or a teacher or a good friend, and get some advice
B: If the situation is really upsetting you, you can plan to meet with a counsellor and work out different ways to deal with it
E: Friendships are a big part of our lives and it’s important to surround yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself
E: Thanks for watching our Rosie video
B: Make sure you check our website, www.rosierespect.org.au for tips, links and videos
E: And if you want to keep up-to-date with what’s going on on Rosie, you can follow us on facebook, instagram or twitter
B: Yes, don’t forget to subscribe to youtube
E: And if you have an idea for a video for Rosie, or you just want to get in touch, you can email us at [email protected]
B: Look after each other and love each other!
Directed & edited by Ally Oliver-Perham & Georgie Proud
Intro credits by Room3 Video Production Studio – with thanks to the girls from Northcote High School!
Presented by Bethany Robinson & Elisabeth Morgan
Filmed by Breeana Dunbar
This video was made possible through a grant from the US Consulate General Melbourne.